


Mitaka's Delicious Mutiny

by Anorlost



Series: Mitaka's Mutiny [2]
Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Gen, Mutiny, and inexplicably battle axes in space, delicious scones, silliness, sort of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-30
Updated: 2016-07-30
Packaged: 2018-07-28 07:52:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,694
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7631440
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anorlost/pseuds/Anorlost
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The dates have been approved and the scones have been baked:  Mitaka finally gets to mutiny!  But why is Hux so anxious and why is he carrying that axe?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Mitaka's Delicious Mutiny

**Author's Note:**

> Been writing some silly stuff because I'm super stressed. We will returned to our regularly scheduled angst when my brain stops breaking. Also hoping it makes Eight feel a little less stressed.

“We’ve decided we’d like to mutiny.” 

Hux stiffened from behind his desk, looking over at several of his bridge officers, led by Thanisson.  The General looked up at them, surprised they weren’t angrier, or armed as they made their declaration.  He nodded quietly folding his hands neatly over his desk.  This was the second time he had been approached with the idea of mutiny in a month, and the first time had hardly counted.  Lieutenant Mitaka had broached the subject, but hardly knew the proper definition of the word.

Retracting his hands slowly, Hux reached for his blaster under his desk, “So…I suppose this is the part where you parade me through the ship, taking pains to humiliate me in front of those who haven’t joined your faction before publically beheading me on the bridge?” 

“What?  No!  Good god, no!” protested Thanisson. 

“Ah, so you’re going to rip out my liver and fry it up with a bit of onion and then eat it in front of me while I bleed out,” concluded Hux calmly, “Excellent choice, though I would have gone with the beheading.  Sends a more powerful message.” 

“Sir, no!  That’s disgusting!” exclaimed Unamo. 

“Why would you even think that?” asked Mandetat. 

“Oh you know, a group of officers approaches their CO and declares intent to mutiny.  It gives one certain ideas,” growled Hux. 

“Well…we were thinking more like this…” said Thanisson, sliding a piece of light blue parchment across the desk. 

Hux looked the paper over and immediately recognized it as Mitaka’s list of ‘demands’ from his bizarre mutiny attempt.  The one that politely asked for extra security or Kylo Ren insurance, Taco Tuesdays, Pizza Fridays, and that Hux smile a little more often.  The one that detailed when and where the mutiny would be held, but only if it was convenient, and what one ought to bring to the mutinous late lunch potluck.  Apparently there would be plenty of delicious scones. 

Looking up from the paper to each of his officers.  His fine officers.  The ones who had impeccable credentials, carefully selected after months of deliberation when Hux was assembling the perfect crew for the Finalizer.  The best and brightest the First Order had to offer. 

“You want to do…this?” asked Hux, holding up the letter between his thumb and forefinger as if it were toxic waste. 

“We think it would be an excellent chance to boost morale,” said Unamo. 

“The crew is overdue for some levity,” added Mandetat. 

“And…Lieutenant Mitaka was so very looking forward to baking scones for the crew,” said Thanisson awkwardly, “So…if it’s quite convenient, we’d like to mutiny.” 

So that was it.  The Lieutenant’s disappointment had not gone unnoticed.  Every time he handed Hux a report or delivered a message he would look at the General as if he were a puppy that had it’s favorite bone taken away.  Hux had come to expect, whenever he looked up, to see Lieutenant Mitaka staring over him with large, pleading eyes.  He had been ignoring the whole thing, waiting for the Lieutenant to stop being ridiculous. 

“So you’re all in on this now,” grumbled Hux, “Who else?  A decent percentage of you?” 

“Well, yes, sir, ever since Lieutenant Mitaka was punished his manifesto has made it’s rounds and,” explained Unamo, “We would all very much like to mutiny, if it’s possible.” 

Hux looked over the letter one more time, “So between 1500 and 1800 hours on Tuesday, you all want to have a potluck lunch, lock me in my office, pretend you all run the ship, and then let me out when you’re all finished having your fun?” 

“Precisely, sir,” said Thanisson, “Though we understand you’re very busy and this time may be inconvenient-”

“If I let you do this, will you promise to never bring up the idea of mutiny in my presence again?” asked Hux. 

“Of course sir,” assured Mandetat, “However we really don’t know why this whole thing has you so on edge.” 

“Oh, I was reading this fascinating little book on history and discovered that mutinies usually don’t end in pizza parties and scone baking,” said Hux, wondering whether or not it would be in his best interests to correct his crew’s ideas on what a mutiny was. 

“Ah, good, then shall we let the crew know when the mutiny will be held, sir?” asked Thanisson. 

Hux, who had been flinching every time the word ‘mutiny’ was uttered looked over at his officers hesitantly, “Only if it’s made explicitly clear what exactly this…’mutiny’…entails.” 

“Of course, we look forward to seeing you there, sir,” said Unamo brightly. 

Hux furrowed his brow.  He was fairly certain he was the first General in the history of the First Order, or the Empire to not only be invited to, but attend his own mutiny. 

   ***  

“General, I’m so glad you could make it,” said Mitaka, beaming up at Hux happily.  He looked about before tilting his head slightly, “Why did you bring that with you, sir?” 

Hux, clutching a massive battle-axe and with his eyes darting about on the hunt for potential threats, muttered quietly, “Oh, you know, no reason, really.” 

“Well, if it makes you feel comfortable,” assured the Lieutenant, holding up a tray of baked goods, “Chocolate chip scone?” 

Lowering the axe slightly, Hux took a scone from the tray and bit into it gingerly.  He slowly chewed and swallowed as Mitaka looked up at him hopefully.  He continued to stare before Hux realized what he wanted.  Hux mumbled awkwardly, “It’s…delicious, Lieutenant…”

“I’m so glad you like them.  I made a special batch just for you, sir.  It’s the least I could do after you approved my mutiny,” said Mitaka. 

“Please don’t call it that,” instructed Hux hurriedly, tightening his grip on the battle-axe. 

“Everyone,” Mitaka called out, “It’s time to lock the General in his office.  Would you like to say a few words before before we lock you up, sir?” 

Hux looked out over the assembled officers.  He clenched the hilt of the axe tighter in his grip as he kept an eye out for anyone who might actually know the definition of mutiny.  Slowly he cleared his throat and began cautiously, “I hope you will all try to behave responsibly for the next few hours and not do anything terribly rash.” 

There was a round of polite applause before Mitaka signaled to Hux, “Right this way, General.” 

He followed Mitaka, continuing to look about cautiously while holding the axe at the ready.  The Lieutenant practically skipped up to his office door he was so giddy.  He began inputting a code that the head of security had written for him so he could override and then lock the door.  Hux expected that, which was part of his reasoning for bringing an axe to his mutiny.  If this went south he ought to be able to hack through the door eventually. 

“We left plenty of food and cold drinks in your office in case you get hungry, and if you need to use the lavatory or there’s an emergency, just knock and someone will let you out,” said Mitaka. 

“You’re not at all concerned I might fake an emergency to try to escape?” asked Hux. 

“Oh, well, we’d really appreciate it if you didn’t do that,” replied the Lieutenant. 

“And you’re absolutely certain nobody wants to mount my head on a pike?” repeated Hux. 

Mitaka frowned, “We really don’t understand why you’d think that, sir.  We’re malcontented, not barbarians.” 

“Right then…don’t do anything too ridiculous…” said Hux, stepping into his office. 

“If the mutiny goes well you’ll be out in a few hours,” assured Mitaka before closing the blast doors.  Hux could hear his muffled voice on the other side, “Now that we’ve secured the General, we can finally have Taco Tuesday!” 

There was a muffled cheer, a much more exuberant one than Hux was expecting as he went to sit at his desk.  Someone had left him a plate of various salads and desserts that had been brought, a pitcher of cold lemonade, and a basket of scones tied with a large pink ribbon and an ornately lettered ‘thank you’ tag.  Hux sat down, hesitantly putting his axe aside as he started to pick at a salad.  He could hear noise outside occasionally, and talk of tacos, but aside from that there was no ruckus.  His men were behaving surprisingly well-conducted. 

In a few hours the blast doors opened and Mitaka poked his head in.  He smiled brightly, “Alright General, you can come out now.” 

Hux hesitantly emerged from the office, finding his ship was shockingly still in one piece.  He held the axe aloft, “It’s over.” 

“Yes, sir, the mutiny is over.  Let’s have a big hand for the General everyone.  We couldn’t have mutinied without him,” said Mitaka adoringly. 

Hux stared in disbelief as the mutineers applauded him before starting to clean up after themselves.  His eyes flicked around the room before he lowered the axe.  It seemed it really was over. 

“I really can’t thank you enough for this General,” said Mitaka with a smile, “We all feel much better now that Kylo Ren related injuries are covered by our insurance, and we’re all looking forward to Pizza Friday.  We were also hoping, if it isn’t too much trouble, could you smile?  We all think you would have a nice smile.” 

Hux glanced about before, with some difficulty, forcing the corners of his mouth to turn up awkwardly before returning to his usual scowl.  Mitaka smiled up at him.  He still wondered how someone as inept at being intimidating had made it this far up the First Order ranks.  It really made no sense whatsoever.  But he supposed no harm came of this whole ‘mutiny’ exercise, but it was not one that Hux cared to repeat. 

Hearing a couple of Petty Officers giggling at them, Hux did his best to show some decorum, shaking Mitaka’s hand before exiting the room as quickly as he could with his battle-axe slung over his shoulder. 

And thus ended the _Finalizer’s_ first, and most delicious, mutiny. 


End file.
